Do you enjoy your pregnancy? Frankly speaking, I do & I don't sometimes. I remembered that my best friend, Ginn did asked me a question after my marriage. "Are you prepared to have a baby?" I told her that of course I'm prepared for it & I even stressed when my menses reported to me each month!
I understood what Ginn was trying to tell me now. Yes, from the day I conceived till now, I was like riding on a roller coaster. The stress can be much more greater than achieving my sales budget. I was stressed out with lots of issues; be it my condition, our relationship & also our baby. Worse still, when Hubby B is working in KL. Sometimes, when I really need him, he is not with me. By the time we meet in the weekend, I have lost some of the interests to share or I have forgotten what to tell him already.
My friends used to assume that Hubby B is a Mummy's Boy. But they were wrong. He never is & in fact, he has very strong characters; which sometimes I have to accept him as he is. As I'm staying with my PIL, sometimes things can be quite complicated depending on how you looking at it. When issues arise, who will you side to? Justice? If both parties are at fault, you can tell your Hubby off. But do you have the guts to tell your PIL that they were wrong too? I bet not many DIL dare to do so. Seriously, BB & MIL are time bombs because you will never know when is the next explosion going to be?
So when my SIL blogged about me on
Pregnancy-Related Decison, I knew that certain of our decisions have already annoyed our PIL. We understand their care & concern to us & Baby Ethan. Indeed, we appreciated it very much. It is true (BB told me so). In return, we also care for them a lot. For instance, we decided to engage a
confinement lady during my confinement period. MIL did not agree with the idea as we have a maid to help out. However, we worry that we can't cope with it. Maid needs to do her house chores & I need ample rest. Then when it comes to night care, we rather have the CL to take care of the baby because of MIL's health condition. We wants her to have a peaceful mind so that she can play with her grandson without much worries.
The most recent one should be
The 2 maids issue. Again, we discussed and agreed to get a babysitter to take care of Ethan. We found the babysitter before the old maid requested to come back to work for us again. Since PIL trusted Susana so much & we also have a new contract maid, PIL has proposed to us to let one of the maid to take care of baby Ethan.
Initially, I do not really agree with the idea. I laid off my concerns to MIL. For me,
cleanliness & hygiene, especially around baby is vital. They can develop minor illness & become ill very quickly. We have a puppy at home & Susana loves to let her wonder around the house. Well, I'll prefer to place it outside the house than letting her in the house because she pees and poops as she likes. Yes, I do not deny that having mild infections in early life can protect against some illness later, but according to the doctors, animals may trigger
asthma too. So prevention is always better. No one would wanna see a baby suffers with all the medication, nebulizer & also hospitalization right?
If Susana can comply to this basic request, I do not mind for the maids to take care of Ethan. After another round of discussion with BB, he still prefer to send Ethan to babysitter. Following are his 3 main concerns:
- He analyzed the 2 maids. Though Eus is soft spoken and obedient, her awareness level is quite low. So for her to take care of Ethan, she might not inform us immediately if baby is having any sudden sickness. Though Susana is a much smarter one, she might has her way of doing things. When things go wrong, she will not admit it. Moreover, she loves going out. What if one fine day, Eus will runaway with Ethan? Nobody knows right?
- He said that he will only let the maids handle Ethan if MIL is willing to stay home. He needs someone to supervise / monitor the maids. Aiyo... it is kind of difficult to get MIL to stay at home right? Again, as a DIL, this is not within my authority to tell her so.
- He agreed that to get a good babysitter is depending on our luck as well. But he trusts that babysitter can perform a much better job than maids; in term of handling baby related issues. At least for the first year when baby's health development is critical.
Sigh... I'm caught in dilemma now. MIL kept selling the benefits of having the maids to take care of the baby & BB insisted to have a babysitter. If Susana never comes back, we believe that this will not be an issue right?